Pain builds over days. It grows, one demeaning thing, another trauma, something else hurtful, and you find yourself to be a person who reacts abnormally to all amiable situations too.

Once, someone misbehaved, and you cried and consoled yourself. You had the whole way to cry it out, cry your heart out for hours. And a few months pass by, and you learn to ignore people, to hear but not respond to them. Implicitly trusting people, being there with them, talking with them, so much easier it all seemed earlier. But now you have a difficult way of treating people.

Each frame triggers an unresolved problem. In each of the friendly faces, you now see the behaviours, the people, the ones with obviously wrong intentions. And you try to deafen, not trying to feel the pain. You become this individual with no emotions to share. No voices can reach you, no new stranger greetings, in each of the hands, smiles, faces, you would find the screams, echoing back, that child’s cry, that discomfort of that grown-up you, all of it, will return.

And you would try to look up, behave naturally in this overgrowing chaos. Seemingly ordinary of the situations, this inward struggle, some fragments of the past, magnifying with this present piece of details, you find yourself paralysed, unable to hear or stop or find that breath.